Tuesday, June 27, 2006

It’s Hard to Lose Weight on a Diet of Chocolate and Carbs

Summer is here and my sweaters and coats are safely packed away until next winter. That leaves me exposed to my skimpy summer t-shirts and light weight pants. As a good friend once told me, “Isn’t it amazing how the dampness in your closet shrinks your clothes from season to season?”

So every spring I start ‘the diet’.

Actually this time I wasn’t doing too badly. Summer is a good time for eating salads and cooked vegetables.

Then, suddenly last night, I found myself craving chocolate again. I don’t know about you but chocolate and carbs are my customary comfort foods. And if you put them together like in rogelach…ambrosia!

It all started when I made the mistake of turning on the news. Big mistake. I have tried to avoid watching the news since the intifada when I knitted all those sweaters I told you about in a previous blog. I meant to put on the Israeli version of ‘Strictly Come Dancing’ and instead of nice people doing the cha cha and samba or waltz, I got our Prime Minister giving a speech.

Usually I would have pretended not to hear him, but this time I had to find out what the news is about our Gilad ben Aviva - our soldier kidnapped by the Hamas. The tension in the country is tangible. Everyone is talking and running to hear or read the latest alert. His sweet face is everywhere. Oy.

Suddenly I got an SMS message on my cell phone. I opened the phone and there was a note from my daughter, in Hebrew that said, ‘Please pray for Gilad ben Aviva and pass this on to five people.’

I cried. One, because the situation is so scary and horrendous, and two, because the children are using whatever means they have to keep our soldier in everyone’s hearts, minds and prayers.

I sent it on to five people. I cried a little more. And that is when I turned on the T.V.

It was then that my inner voice started whispering in my ear… chocolate…chocolate…

I fought it off. I reminded it of the t-shirts and light-weight clothes.

And then I went and made some 93% no fat microwave pop corn.

The Hamas are not going to make me fat. No, sir! Not this time. I learned my lesson during the intifada when they had control of my eating habits.

Today I am liberated! Today I am back to the farkakteh salads.

But, with G-d’s help when we get our soldier back, I will be happy to celebrate with a nice, little piece of hot chocolate cake with the runny stuff that dribbles onto the plate when you cut into it and runs into the waiting mound of vanilla ice cream.

And a diet coke.

Let’s keep praying for Gilad and his family and may they and we only know simchas.

Have a good day…stay safe…and thanks for dropping in.


At 1:40 AM, Anonymous Morrey said...



At 1:42 AM, Anonymous itsy said...

My dear Epess
I just love the way you communicate on the page (screen). Its as though you were speaking directly to me. I have often thought about you whenever there is a skirmish in Israel. I am truly very happy that you and your family are safe and well.
Stay well and you are now on my favourites list so I will read your blog daily.

At 1:43 AM, Anonymous THe Guv said...

I don't live in a country where "tension" is everyone's given middle name. But, I AM a mother, and I DO know what it's like to turn to chocolate, and/or ( Especially, "and" ) carbs when the going gets tougher than you ever thought possible.

All that to say, that I'm very proud of you and your personal, unique stand against the Hamas !!! The cowardly bastards are too stupid to know it, but they are up against determined people like you. People, not only strong enough to turn down chocolate, but people who are personal friends of Ha Shem's.

For the past few days I've been praying for "our" Gilad Ben Aviva's safe return, and have asked my friends and relatives to do the same. I can see now that that has NOT been enough. Today I will pray AND I will turn my back on anything fattening. Like chocolate. Today, your neighbours, those thoughtless bastards, won't actually know it, but one of Ha Shem's Canadian, personal friends will be adding a carb-free exclamation point to her prayers. So, maybe today they won't know what they are dealing with, but eventually, your neighbouring pond scum will catch on ! First, they'll be shown, once again, that THEY are NOT the chosen people. For good reason! And, second, they'll learn that ONE SHOULD NEVER, AND I DO MEAN NEVER, F--- WITH FATTIES ON A CARB-FREE DIET. Yes indeed, in the long run, they'll never win against us, nor will they ever forget this experience !!!!!

Chazak, v'chazak.

The Guv

At 1:44 AM, Anonymous tamara and isaac said...

Keep on bloging Baby!!!!!!
I & Isaac really enjoy it.
Funny that us immigrants have same experiences no matter where we immigrate from or to.
No wonder they call us wondering Jews.
So, as I said in the beginning: Keep on bloging.
Love, hugs and kisses
Tamara & Isaac

At 1:45 AM, Anonymous maeshey said...

You stay safe, herst. We are all watching to see what is going to happen. A very scary time.
XO Maeshey

At 4:31 AM, Anonymous Neshie said...

Just to let you know that I connect with you and think of you and yours all the time.....through thick (ahem) and thin.

And now of course with tensions running as high as they are we are waiting to see what happens and pray for the safe return of Gilad Ben Aviva and the young settler.


At 5:55 PM, Anonymous John said...

What a great way to illustrate the way things look from our side.

Marallyn, every one of your posts is great!


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