Thursday, July 26, 2007

WISDOM OF LARRY THE CABLE GUY

Sometimes...well, for me anyway, it's always better to laugh. Or smile. Dontcha think so? Meet Larry the Cable Guy. Duh!!!

1. A day without sunshine is like night.

2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.

6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the
cheese in the trap.

9. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.

10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.

12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.

14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?

15. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines

19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

20. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, "What the heck happened?"

22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.

23. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear
bright until you hear them speak.

24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates. it's more like a jar of
jalapeno's. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

2 Comments:

At 8:19 AM, Blogger CONNIE'S THOUGHTS FROM THE HEART said...

That is so funny. I am still laughing . I am going to have to show this to my husband. Thank you for giving me a good laugh just as I am about to go to sleep for the night. Have a good week end. Connie from Texas

 
At 9:10 PM, Blogger Val said...

Now THAT's a send off for the weekend! Lovely!
Shabbat Shalom.

 

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