Tuesday, June 30, 2009

MERDE

Well, there I was getting happy with France for the first time in a very long time. See, the French, since De Gaulle got pissed that we didn't wait to be turned into ashes by our neighbours in 1967, have not been our number one fans.

Actually, they have done a lot of yukky things such as not allowing our boats to leave Cherbourg. Remember that story? Google it...I am sure it is there. Along with capturing Eichman, may his name be erased from memory, and Entebbe...Cherbourg was a humdinger of a story.

I was a tourist in the country the day they pulled into port.

Sacré bleu! The French!

Then along comes Sarkozy! Who, I thought...silly me...was different. Get this my friends.

Sarkozy urges Netanyahu: Get rid of Lieberman
By Barak Ravid, Haaretz Correspondent Last update - 21:54 29/06/2009
www.haaretz.com/hasen/spages/1096504.html

French President Nicolas Sarkozy has urged Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu
to "get rid" of hard-line Foreign Minister Avigdor Lieberman, Channel Two
reported on Monday.

The Foreign Ministry responded to the report by lambasting the French leader
for his "intolerable intervention in internal Israeli affairs."

Sarkozy spent a good portion of his meeting with Netanyahu last Wednesday
discussing the composition of the Israeli official, according to the report.
The presence of three other Israeli officials at the meeting did not deter
the French leader from expressing his true opinion of the foreign minister,
said Channel Two.


Well! Did you ever? How gauche!

First of all, as Bubbie Channah A'H would say,"It's none of his khazersheh business!"

Wait! Wait! I get it! Now all the heads of countries can move diplomats around like chess pieces on a big board. I don't like Ahmadinadoole...checkmate! Hamas in Gaza? Checkmate! How about that bin Laden? Think he should be mated?

How dare you Mr.French President Nicolas Sarkozy?!?!

I never thought I would say this. Come closer, I may have to whisper...I love Lieberman. There, I said it! Why? because I trust him. I may not like everything he says but he says it out loud...in your face. And, after all the sleezy politicians we have had here lately, that is like a breath of fresh air.

One evening, about a year and a half ago, my friend Rena and I were out for dinner. At the time, we were the only people in that part of the restaurant. All of a sudden a guy walks in with an ear piece like the secret service wear. How do I know? I live in Israel. These guys are everywhere a major politician is. You know the look. White cord comes out the back or side of the guy's collar...has a little curly thing like a miniature phone cord and plugs in to one ear.

He checks out the room and then talks into his watch or something and a few minutes later Lieberman and party entered the room and sat across from us.

The man is not someone you could miss or ignore. The man is surrounded by an aura of strength that is almost palpable. The kind of power that is sexy. Well, you know what I mean.

We smiled at each other...ate our meals...exchanged a few words...wished him good luck...and left.

He was charming. I told you, you can run into the most interesting political people in normal restaurants here.

A few weeks ago I was at the beauty parlor talking to Natalie my miracle worker. I happened to mention Lieberman and how amazed I am that I am beginning to really like him.

Oh, Natalie said. He is wonderful.
You know him? I asked.
Yes. And his wife and daughter are amazing women.

Israel! Dontcha just love it?

Mr. French President. Clean up your own house before you point a finger at mine. And, as my Daddy A'H used to say, "Remember, Marallyn, every time you point a finger at someone, you have three more pointing back at you."

I guess the French President didn't have a daddy like I did.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

REALITY

If you check out the map below you will see that the little green one is Israel.
The rest are the Arab countries.
And do you honestly...honestly... think that the settlements are what is stopping the Middle East from having peace?
No, of course you don't!!!
Neither do I.
Now we have to convince POTUS.
Sigh...
He sure set the ball rolling.

Here is what I got in my email today:

Reuters: Mideast Quartet urges Israel to halt settlements.
YnetNews: G8 calls on Israel to freeze settlements.
BBCNews: Israel urged to halt settlements.

HELLO...IS ANYONE HOME??? TAKE A LOOK AT THE MAP BELOW!!!

Ah, hell...what's the sense talking.

It's the elephant and the Jewish problem...all our fault.

But, maybe one day instead of pointing fingers at the Jews...someone will notice that the settlements have been merely a smoke screen and while everyone was busy getting the smoke out of their eyes, the real problem grew into a raging bull.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

The RUSSIANS are Coming...The RUSSIANS are Coming!!!

In 1966 a comedy hit the theatres starring Carl Reiner, Eva Marie Saint, Allan Arkin and Theodore Bikel. We were all still in the air raid siren drills and wondering where to build fallout shelters. The name of the film was/is The RUSSIANS are Coming the RUSSIANS are Coming. Here is the plot:

When a Soviet submarine captain comes up for a look at America (off the coast of a small island in Massachusetts) he runs aground. He sends his two English speaking crewmen to procure a boat with enough power to pull them off. The 2 English speakers, along with 7 other Russian sailors, don't exactly blend in and the town is convinced that they are being invaded.

All joking aside, the fear of a Russian invasion was real and very scary when I was growing up.

I think I mentioned in a previous blog that the only time I was really frightened...no, I take that back...the only time I was hysterically frightened during the Yom Kippur War was when we were told that the Russian military was on alert and getting ready to sail to the Middle East.

That's it! We're dead!

Since that time, I really haven't been afraid of our Soviet neighbours. We have over a million Russian Jews and maybe not so Jewish new immigrants...I love them! The Soviet Union is no more and the Russian states are now working towards their own independence. Das V'Danyah Comrade!

Then, one day last week, when I was having lunch with a friend in the Botanical Gardens up the road from my place, she asked me what I thought about all the Czars.

Czars? Peter the Great...Ivan the Terrible...Catherine the Great...Alexander...Nicholas??? I started naming Czars.

No, she said. Obama's czars.

Obama has Czars? Our Obama? I mean your Obama?

Then I started reading about the Czars. What the hell is going on? Hello??? Anybody home???

I Googled Czars of Russia and got the St. Petersburg Times(how appropriate...from Florida, not Russia...PolitiFact.Com...2009 Pulitzer Prize Winner) In it I found a whole article about the czars and who they are and how they came to be and what McCain said about Obama having more Czars than the Romanovs who ruled Russia for three centuries!

And you thought McCain didn't have a sense of humour.

I now know that what a Czar is and that Obama is certainly not the first to use them...but it seems that he has more Czars than anyone else including the Romanovs. :)

There was, however, one sentence that made me see RED...ahem.

But to the extent that Obama has created a number of new positions to oversee various issues and to cut through bureaucratic red tape, he seems to have a lot more czars than his predecessors.


OK...POTUS has Czars and they cut through red tape and he isn't the first but he seems to have more than the other guys had. Am I getting it right?

In order to shorten this blog post, I erased the list of the 28 Czars and their Czar title and their not so sexy real title.

That's a whole lot of people reporting to the President who don't have to get any congressional approval before they get the job. That's a whole lof of people reporting to the President period.

The big deal seems to be the Car Czar...and his assistant. And what the hell do they know about the automobile industry at all? But who cares? They got the job...they owe their boss...they report what they can and everyone is happy.

I'm not happy. The only time I did not vote for Bibi was when I thought he was taking too much power onto his own shoulders and I was worried about our/my freedom. So I voted for someone else. I wasn't sorry then and I am not sorry now.

Now, I voted for him. Now, I trust him. And as the days go by I wish him strength. See, the only thing in the universe that is stopping world peace is our settlements. If we didn't have settlements there would be joy throughout the land and people would be dancing in the streets.

The Iranian people are being shot like sitting ducks in the street and the big deal is our settlements.

Have you any idea how many of our soldiers were wounded and killed because WE did not shoot down any of the demonstrators or people throwing stones and boulders at us during not one but two intifadas?

WE can stand proud and hold our heads high!

But, no I guess we can't. We want the people living in the settlements to have babies and get married and have more babies and have a place for them to live and sleep and eat and play with their friends.

BAD ISRAEL!!! SHAME ON US!!!

Two articles online about Israel caught my attention today. One...Israel has now invented a fridge that converts to an oven on Shabbat so our religious soldiers can eat hot meals.

And, two:
IAF helicopter evacuates Palestinian who fell from cliff
Dr. Aaron Lerner Date: 25 June 2009

IMRA has learned from official IDF sources that on Wednesday afternoon a
Palestinian came to the Lamed Heh passage in the Etzion Bloc south west of
Bethlehem yesterday and reported to the IDF reserve force stationed there
that his friend fell from a cliff in the Wadi Etziona area near the passage.

Medical forces from the Etzion Brigade cane to the site but because of
conditions in the area an IAF rescue helicopter was dispatched and the
wounded Palestinian was evacuated to an Israeli hospital for treatment.


Dr. Aaron Lerner, Director IMRA (Independent Media Review & Analysis)
(Mail POB 982 Kfar Sava)
Tel 972-9-7604719/Fax 972-3-7255730
INTERNET ADDRESS: imra@netvision.net.il
Website: http://www.imra.org.il

For free regular subscription:
Subscribe at no charge: imra-subscribe@imra.org.il


That is who WE are. When we walked into Ramallah a few years ago by mistake THEY butchered us and threw us out the window. Remember? Maybe some of you still do.

How much do you want to bet that neither of these articles hit the waves.

I know what is going to hit the air waves. Obama's Health Care Plan. He gets to put his plan in front of the world all by himself and ABC is giving him the stage...for an hour.

But, what I hear is that ABC is not letting the other team say anything.

When I was growing up each side had to have equal time. Remember?

But, maybe some pigs are more equal than others.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

Monday, June 22, 2009

YOU TELL 'EM LADY!!!

I received this as an e-mail from my friend Rosaline this morning. I read it and I loved it. So, I decided to share it.

Enjoy.

This is something we should all read at least once a week! Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio

To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.

It is the most requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:


1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.

5. Pay off your credit cards every month.

6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.

8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.

18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.

20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion...
Today is special.

22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.

23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

24. The most important sex organ is the brain.

25 No one is in charge of your happiness but you.

26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'

27 Always choose life.

28. Forgive everyone everything.

29. What other people think of you is none of your business.

30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.

31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

33. Believe in miracles.

34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.

35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.

36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.

37. Your children get only one childhood.

38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.

39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.

40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.

41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

42. The best is yet to come.

43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.(that's why it is called The Present...mbm)

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

JUST ANOTHER LITTLE OLD ISRAELI...HERO

I just got this site from my cousin Shelley in Toronto. I opened it and immediately recognized the little old man who was talking. Thanks, Shelley! But...I never knew this story.

There are so many stories in Israel...and everywhere in fact. That is why I love talking to old people...well people who are older than me. :)

They have stories and if we are patient enough and quiet enough we will always walk away smarter and filled with awe.

Meet Shlomo Hillel and then, please go see this youtube. They walk among us.

Shlomo Hillel immigrated to Palestine with his family in 1934 at the age of
eleven. [1] After graduating from the Herzliya Hebrew High School in Tel Aviv,
he underwent agricultural training in Kibbutz Degania Alef, and later Pardes
Hana.

Hillel was secretary of a Hebrew Scouts group which later established
Kibbutz Ma'agan Michael.

In 1945, Hillel and his colleagues worked at a Haganah
munitions factory disguised as a laundry facility in the basement of the Ayalon
Institute in Rehovot.[2][3]

He studied political science, economics and public administration at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem.

Shlomo and Temima Hillel have two children, a son and a daughter. [1] They live in Jerusalem's Ramat Denya neighborhood.

In 1952-1959, Hillel was a member of the 2nd and 3rd Knesset, representing Mapai.

He then joined the Israeli foreign service, and was appointed Israeli ambassador to Guinea (1959-1961), and Côte d'Ivoire, Dahomey, Republic of Upper Volta, and Niger (1961-1963).

In 1963-1967, Hillel was a member of the Israeli Delegation to the United Nations, He returned to Israel to serve as the Deputy Director of the Israeli Foreign Affairs Ministry (1967-1969).[4]

In 1969, Hillel was re-elected to the Knesset on the Alignment
list. He served consecutively from the 7th Knesset until the 12th Knesset. He
was Minister of Police in 1969-1977 and Interior Minister in 1974 and 1977. In
1984 he was elected Speaker of the 11th Knesset.[4]


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQNw5MA3DII

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

SOMETIMES YOU JUST GODDA SHARE

For those of you who don't know him...and for those of you who have never visited his site...meet my brother David...the best of the Pasikovs.

http://www.psychotherapistboulder.com/

have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in

Monday, June 15, 2009

THE TRUTH...THE WHOLE TRUTH...AND...

Last night...at a little after eight o'clock, everyone I knew was sitting in front of their televisions waiting to hear our Prime Minister deliver his long-awaited speech.

I cancelled students. I grabbed a bottle of water and my chicken salad and made myself comfortable.

From every window of my house, all that could be heard was Bibi talking. None of my neighbours had any other channel on...just Bibi.

Before we go any further, I should state that I am a card carrying member of the Likud party. I get to vote in their internal elections as well as in the national elections. I have voted for Bibi more than once. And once I did not vote for him.

From the moment he began to speak until his final word I was breathless. Finally! Somebody said it out loud. How many people would be alive today if somebody had said it when our leaders at the time ran to embrace Oslo?

So many things he said amazed me. But here is one that made me listen even closer:

"In order to bring an end to the conflict, we must give an honest and
forthright answer to the question: What is the root of the conflict?

In his speech to the first Zionist Conference in Basel, the founder of the
Zionist movement, Theodore Herzl, said about the Jewish national home "This
idea is so big that we must speak of it only in the simplest terms." Today,
I will speak about the immense challenge of peace in the simplest words
possible."


How simple. How elequant. How absolutely correct! And then he went on to say it. He said it out loud....

"Even as we look toward the horizon, we must be firmly connected to reality,to the truth. And the simple truth is that the root of the conflict was, and
remains, the refusal to recognize the right of the Jewish people to a state
of their own, in their historic homeland."


Bingo!!!

I always said, I can love you like mad...buy you expensive gifts...give you anything you want...put your needs above my own....

I can do all that. But I can't make you love me! Either you do...or you don't. And all my fine gestures and all my wonderful, expensive gifts won't make you love me if you don't.

And, when did any of us think, for just one second, that our neighbours love us? Who was it that said, 'Arafat never misses an opportunity to miss an opportunity."?

When is the world going to wake up and realize that we are a splinter in their backside...we are the speck of dust on their pristine carpet...that THEY DO NOT WANT PEACE.

Simple, no?

Thank you Mr. Prime Minister! For the first time in a very long time, I think I can sleep at night knowing that someone is honestly and truely at the helm of our very little ship that is floating in a very big and dangerous sea.

And then, this morning just as I was feeling safe, I read something else. I read an article stating that Obama was happy with Bibi's speech. That's good.

BUT THEN...get this my friends...the article from Haaretz newspaper went on to say:
"At the time of the speech, Haaretz learned, Obama was playing golf."


He what?!!!?

Well...I guess that shows us! I mean exercise is important. And as President of the United States, Mr. Obama must not get enough exercise. And, the speech was around eight at night making it around noon...one o'clock his time. Is mid afternoon a good time to go out in the sun and play golf? I guess it must be. And, if it is good enough for POTUS, then, hell, maybe the rest of the world should have made other plans instead of listening to our Prime Minister.

Hell, it's only Israel. Who cares?

So, if no one cares, then why are we on the front page of everyone's agenda?

He was out playing golf!!!

Here is anther fishbone that remains stuck in my throat. When Bibi and Sarah Netanyahu were in the States a few weeks ago, Mrs. Obama didn't meet with our Prime Minister's wife. She had tickets to a concert...or the theatre, I think it was the theatre. She did ask her husband what to do and Mr. President told her not to change her plans...to go to the theatre.

Mr. Obama, Sir. If it was Mrs. First Lady from Canada...or Germany...or Russia...or Great Britain...or the European Union...or Palestine (is there a first lady...or any lady?)...would you have told your wife the same thing? OF COURSE NOT!!! That would have been an insult. And you wouldn't want to insult any of THEM.

What is POTUS telling Israel? And what message is he sending out to the world about how he feels about Israel?

If golf is more important and going to the theatre is more important to Mr. and Mrs. President of the United States of America...then what is the little anti-Semitic guy going to think...or the Arabs...or the EU?

Me? I take it as a great insult! A slap in the face!

The whole world was waiting for Bibi's speech. He spoke his heart out. He gave the world enough time. He picked an hour that was convenient to everyone.

I guess he didn't know what a lover of golf Obama is. I mean Jackie Mason said it so well. "Me? If I get a splinter in my finger, I run around and take myself into Sinai Hospital and see a doctor. You? If you fall into an open manhole and die...what do I care?"

You think I'll get into a lot of trouble if I say, "Shame on you Mr. President."? Maybe I better not. But as President Carter...also not a great lover of Israel once said..."I have sinned in my heart."

And we are supposed to be great friends. I guess with friends like these, Israel dosen't need any...you fill in the rest.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

DEAR MR. 2000 YEAR OLD MAN

Do any of you remember Mel Brooks as the 2000 year old man? I love him. Mel Brooks. I love smart. Especially when smart doesn't hurt or make fun of anyone.

For those of you who haven't yet had the joy of listening to the 2000 year old man...don't wait...get the tapes...borrow the old records...talk to someone like me who can quote them verbatum. Sit back and enjoy the brilliance of Mel Brooks.

Carl Reiner had a list of questions...Mel Brooks didn't see them in advance. Carl asked...and Mel answered...and the rest is fireworks.

Carl: You must have had many wives.
2000 YOM: Hundreds and hundreds of wives. (all spoken in a yiddish accent as he...naturally...well you get it...2000 years ago)
Carl: Do you remember all of them?
2000YOM: I remember the third one...Shoiley...a redhead!

Carl: Did you know Paul Revere?
2000 YOM: I knew him and I hated him...anti-Semetic bastard.
Carl: What?
2000YOM: He ran around shouting, 'The Yiddish are coming! The Yiddish are coming!"
Carl: BRITISH...The BRITISH are coming.
2000YOM: Oy, and I didn't send his wife a card or anything.

And on and on and on the joy goes.

Those of us who know the skits talk them in our daily conversations. For example when I am about to hang up the phone with my brother David or my almost brother Maeshey, I'll say...'Ok. You go save France.' and the other will add, 'And I'll wash up.'

Nope. I'm not going to explain. Go...Go my children. Meet the 2000 Year Old Man.

So, why am I writing all this you may ask. One of the many bon mots of wisdom that came out of his mouth was this sentence: "WE MOCK THE THINGS WE ARE TO BE".

And today, I am ashamed to admit, that applies to me. How? Go ahead...ask me.

You know those guys who quit smoking. The ones who smoke their last cigarette and that's it. No more. Finished! Not me Bertram! I'm done Murray!

And then they begin smoking YOURS! Ahhhh. You know those guys.

Well, no I haven't started smoking again. I quit on October 4, 1994. Gained a person along the way, but I don't smoke.

Last week, I decided to quit Diet Coke. Cold turkey. No more Coke. Not for me. Instead, I am drinking water. Don't ask. Me? Water? Fish pish in there. Oy.

Now, if I would have kept my big mouth shut I would have been just fine. But, when have you ever heard of me keeping my mouth shut? I told everyone in the house that I am a new person! Saving the money...watching my health...Coke eats rust...water is wonderful...puhleeze!

In the middle of the night, I began to need a couple of swallows. Not a lot. Just a couple. I could have snuck a bottle into the house and hidden it in my room. But there is nothing more disgusting than warm Diet Coke. Trust me on this one.

I started buying seltzer. Nice. Clear. You can see through it. It does have bubbles but they don't have the right taste.

So I became one of those cigarette guys. I now only drink Diet Coke when I go out with my friends. There I drink Coke with my meal.

I think it is something like having a kosher house but eating treif in a restaurant. My house is kosher...my stomach isn't. I always thought that if my daughter-in-law knew what I ate she'd never let me kiss the babies again. Oy!

My next step is to drink water in the restaurants too. So far I've failed the restaurant test.

But, don't give up on me. There is hope yet. Every time I fill my little empty Coke bottle with water I feel righteous. As I drink and pish I feel thin.

Ah Mr. 2000 Year Old Man. How did you get so smart?

Shavuah tov.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

IT'S HARD TO BE A GOOD DAUGHTER...OY

I tried to be a good daughter to Bubbie Channah. I did. And it was only after she passed away that I thought of all the things I could have done...should have done...might have done.

But nothing compares to the daughter in yesterday's news here in Israel. All she wanted to do was something nice for her old mother. So she bought her a new mattress. Read on:

June 10, 2009
Woman throws away million-dollar mattress
Philippe Naughton

An Israeli woman who bought her elderly mother a new mattress threw out the old one unaware that it had $1 million hidden inside it.

Israeli newspapers reported today that the woman was left scrabbling through landfill sites in an, as yet, fruitless search for the mattress which contained her mother's life savings.

The woman, identified only as Anat, a resident of Tel Aviv, told Army Radio that she bought the mattress on Monday as a surprise for her mother and got rid of the other one without telling her.

When she realised her mistake she rushed outside to look for the mattress but found it had already been taken by the rubbish collectors. Subsequent searches at three different landfill sites turned up nothing.

The Israeli daily Yediot Ahronot published a picture of the woman searching through refuse at a dump in southern Israel.

Yitzhak Borba, the dump manager, told the radio station that his staff was helping the woman, saying she appeared “totally desperate”, but the mattress was hard to find among the 2,500 tonnes of rubbish arriving at the site every day.

Mr Borba said that he increased security at the site to keep would-be treasure hunters at bay. For her part, Anat is displaying an admirable stoicism. “People have to take everything in proportion and thank God for the good and the bad,” she said.


Oy!!! Am I glad I'm not that lady!!! And you thought you had troubles???
I'm hypervenilating and I don't even know these people. Thank you God...Thank you God...

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

TIME OUT FOR FUN :)

I'M GREEN!!! I just came back from the makolet...like a 7/11 up the street. Since I only needed a few things, I took my handy green DON'T USE PLASTIC BAGS bag.

I love my bag. I love it so much I bought four of them. I feel so righteous when I fill it up and tell the people at the cash registers, "No, thanks. I'm green!"

Of course we will not discuss how much stuff can fit into those bags and just how heavy they become. Nope. I fill my bag and bending down, ease my arm through the loops, adjust the two straps onto my shoulder, lock my knees and wabble home.

There are just some things you do that make you feel good. My green bags are one...saving water is another.

Coming from a country rich in water, it took me quite some time go get used to the shortages we have in the Middle East, and this year is the worst it has been in a long time.

It is so bad that there are commercials on TV. Famous people tell us we have to cut back on water and save the Kinneret...the Sea of Galilee. As they are talking their faces begin to crack like dry mud in the desert. Very effective.

I now dampen my dishes...turn off the water...soap them and clean with the spongee thing...turn the water back on and rinse. I do the same in the shower...well without the spongee thing.

So, now I have green bags and watch my water consumption. We have plastic bottles in the toilet tanks so that controls the amount of water in the tanks.

I don't buy syrofoam anything...that clogs the environment like shmaltz in your arteries.

I throw away my plastic bottles in the special bin set up next to the makolet.

I don't know why I'm telling you all this, except I thought we would take a break from the OHMYGOD WHATTHEHELL ISGOINGON emails I have been sending lately.

I think that is known as comic relief. (Between us, I always felt the saddest person in the circus was the clown...ahhhhh Pagliacci.)


When I graduated from Wayne State, I moved into a lovely apartment in Royal Oak, Michigan with a girlfriend. There were three apartments on each floor and we were on the ground level. It was a great place...great.

On our floor were two bachelors...David, a young Chrysler exec, and Maynor, a salesman from Lubbock, Texas.


After three weeks, Maynor came up to me one day and said, "Darlin', you are so green if you stand on a mountain, no one will ever find you."

OY!

That was the first time I went from being a greenhorn to just being green!

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

ps. In my last post is a terrible typo...Uzi Landau...not Uri...vey.

Sunday, June 07, 2009

COME ON OVER FOR COFFEE...I'LL BRING ROGELACH

I was told by a friend who I really love and respect that I should stop reading stuff and stop listening to the news and enjoy my life.

What a great idea. But, see I don't live in a place where that is really possible. I live in a place where we were once warned not to go around with headphones as we walked in the street so we could hear the terrorists shout Allah hu Akbar before they knifed us from behind. I am serious. Deadly serious.

I live in a place where during the last intifada, I didn't know for months who would be coming home alive and/or well every evening. And, I had to send my children to school and my husband to work and my Mom to the grocery store and myself into town where my learning center was located...and hit twice by two suicide bombers.

I live in a place where talking to God is a local call. I live in a place where Kings walked. I live in a place where old olive trees watched two Temples being destroyed...well, I'm not sure about that one but it sounds good and it could be true. :)

I live in a place where Jesus was born...lived...and died. Come here I'll show you where he walked.

I live in a place where a champion tennis player's mother lived upstairs from me. Where Ehud Barak's brother lived down the hall from me. I live in a place where I can see AND TALK TO our chaveri Knesset...our members of parliament... in any restaurant in town. I have seen them and I have talked to them. And they were kind and gracious and lovely. Two were at my neice's wedding...Uzi Landau and Limor Livnat.

I live in a place where politicians are family, where policemen are relatives, where doctors are related to the man who owns the little store down the street and asks to be remembererd to the owner.

I live in a place where if I am ever, God forbid, in trouble, the people who come to my rescue are family.

I live in a place where I am surrounded by people who want me dead. I live in a place where my cousins spell PEACE P-I-E-C-E. I live in a place where they won't be satisfied until they own all the pieces. Down to the last grain of sand.

I live in a place where God told Moses He wanted his people to live. And prosper.

I live in a place that God gave the Jews.

And there is room for everyone. Every peace loving person.

I just don't recognize them or know who they are. I see them in my shopping centers and my streets and my hospitals. They are free to come and go.

If I go near any of their places I have been warned that I may not come back alive.

How come they can and I can't?

Maybe it is because I live in a place that sees them as people...that is happy and willing to share everything we have with them.

It used to be that American leaders talked about that great country as a free home for Christians and Jews. Have any of you noticed we have been shoved into third place? Lost our silver and have to be content with bronze. I don't know why but every time I hear him say 'Christians...Muslims...and Jews' it rankles.

That is not true. You and I both know why...but I am tired of doing my imitation of Chicken Little screaming The Sky is Falling!!! The Sky is Falling!!!

But, I won't stop until I am certain that the things that really are falling from the skies over Israel are not things which will hurt us, kill us, or, God forbid erase us from the map.

I know they want to...I know they'd like to...I just don't know if they are brave enought to try to.

But, I do know that helping them get braver is not good for any of us. I loved reading that Hillary said there would be great repercussions if Iran bombed us. Did that make you feel better? What exactly does that mean? And how is that going to be good or bad for the Jews, as Bubbie Channah would ask. I mean, if we are now toast what the hell would we care about repercussions?

I would have felt a lot better if she had said that if they even THINK of bombing us etc. etc. etc. Sigh...

What do you think?

Thank you for all your emails...for those who disagree with me and for those who see things as I do. I am thrilled to hear from you all.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

Friday, June 05, 2009

SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO LISTEN TO A SMART PARENT

I have been getting a lot of emails concerning my blogs. One group says 'You Rock Girl'...well you know what I mean.

The other group says 'You Should be Ashamed of Yourself'.

So. Please. If you wish to be taken off this list please email me and I will do so immediately. marallyn@gmail.com

When I was growing up in Windsor, my mother had one saying. It was her litmus paper. No matter what news I had or what I wanted to share with her, she would say, "Is it good or bad for the Jews."

When I wanted to be a Brownie in second or third grade, she informed me that Jewish Girls do not go to Brownies...they go to the I.L.Peretz Jewish School instead. End of discussion.

When I wanted to go to Frank Walton's party on one Friday night, my mother told me that Frank wasn't Jewish and that she was certain I would have a great time. But, then what. Jewish girls do not go to gentile boys high school parties. They go to the Jewish Center and mingle with boys that they can date. End of discussion.

I did explain it to Frank and we remained great friends. I have often wondered where he is and what he is doing. He was a nice boy.

I miss my mother. More and more every day I miss my mother. She was interesting, funny, very clever, and intelligent.

I wonder what she would have to say about Obama's speech. If it was good or bad for the Jews. Personally, I think it was terrible for us. Israel for sure. And at one point I think he gave away my Jerusalem!

I didn't know it was his to give away.

I loved listening to him. His voice and words were soft as honey. He spoke of a world all of us would love to live in. If he could deliver that world we would all be safer and happier and better and the lion will lie down with the lamb.

But so far the lions are hungry and the lambs look like easy pickings.

When I was thirteen a new Rabbi came to town. And he opened the first Temple in the city. One evening he called for all the teenagers to come to a meeting. I was one of them. He was amazing. His words filled us with enthusiasm and we were chomping at the bit to get on his bandwagon.

When I got home, I ran to tell my parents all about the Rabbi and his plans for the city. He needs me, I told my parents.

My father A'H, who was always a quiet man. A man well-loved and respected in the community. A man who felt keenly his obligations as a husband, a father and a Jew living in Windsor, said, "Marallyn. It isn't important if he needs you. Of course he needs you. What you have to decide, is whether you need him. Who is he? What is he? Are you certain that you wish to have your name associated with his policies and his ideals."

After carefully checking him out, I realized that I didn't. My Daddy was right.

But, if he would have let me be carried away by words, I would have followed him, supported him and been associated with him.

He wasn't a bad man. He wasn't the strange radical man he turned out to be in later years. But the more time went by, the happier I was that I walked away way back then.

My Daddy taught me a good lesson. He didn't forbid me from getting involved in the youth group the Rabbi was trying to establish. He made me think. And I trusted him. And I respected him. And I thought.

Who am I to tell any of you what to do? And as my friends so aptly put it, my views are coloured by the fact that I live where I live and have lived what I have lived.

But, along with that, because of the above two sentences, I know what I know.

As an astrologer, I learned very quickly the power of air. Not fire. Not earth. And not water. Air. Air carries the pollen that fertilizes the flowers. It carries a kiss blown from one loved one to another. But it also carries disease. And words.

Remember the old saying, 'Sticks and Stones can break your bones...but names will never harm you.' Not true.

During World War II there arose a man who spoke words. Before he died millions were killed. I am not going to elaborate. I am not waving the holocaust flag. But that man...may his name be erased forever...is the only example I have from my own lifetime. Words are scary.

A word spoken in haste can take a lifetime to retract. The big one in my life was being called a Damn Jew. Twice that happened in my wonderful city of Windsor. And I didn't stick around for the third time. I moved where no one could call me that again. There is a huge difference between hatred and anti-Semitism. Well, for me there is.

One other thing my father told me. He said, 'Marallyn, be careful what you put down on paper. Once it is on paper it becomes a document.'

That sentence kept me from being a writer. I became a storyteller instead. Until, a few years ago I had such a burning desire to write that I looked for three years until I found my mentor and friend, David Brauner who taught me how to get my words on paper. Bless him.

I listened to President Obama's speech. Carefully. I listened to what was said and what was left out. Sometimes the spaces are more important than the words. You all know those pictures that come into your emails where you have to look carefully to discover the two faces instead of the vase.

And half truths are even more scary. They sound good and are quickly adopted as fact.

BTW---Mr. President...Whoever destroys a soul, it is considered as if he destroyed an entire world. And whoever saves a life, it is considered as if he saved an entire world. - Jerusalem Talmud, Sanhedrin 4:8 (37a)
The Jerusalem Talmud dates back to the third century C.E. -- Mohammed was not even born until about 570.


Shavuah tov.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS


Have a great day...stay safe...thanks for dropping in.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

HALEVAI

I listened very closely to THE SPEECH. The words flowed like a spring breeze over the airlines and I couldn't help thinking...wow the man can talk. But we all know that.
Today I am going to give him a break. And wait twenty-four hours and listen to all the talking heads both on TV and my friends the bloggers.

And maybe wishes do come true.
Buckwheat wished he had a watermelon.
Bubbie Channah A'H wished she would win the lottery.
I wish everyone sleeps soundly in their own beds.
From my heart Mr. President...AHLEVAI!!!

Halevai is a Yiddish word that means...'if only'...'don't I wish'

Halevai - We Wish
Lyrics: Ehud Manor
Music and singing: Boaz Sharabi

We wish
That from the cloud a rainbow will come down
We wish
That this world will be better some day

We wish
That a new day will come out of the storm
We wish
That the present will last forever

We wish
That grass will grow in the desert
We wish
That we will be able to live in the shade of the fig tree again.

We wish not to hurt
And one will love another
We wish
That the gates of heaven will reopen

We wish
for East and West to join together
We wish
To be able to live like in the old days.

We wish
That one nation will not fight against another
We wish
To never stop hoping

We wish
For man to be passionate till evening
We wish
To have another chance with love


Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

A RIVER IN EGYPT

Well, I cheated. Instead of running down the six flights of stairs to my fallout shelter yesterday, I listened to that little voice that has been talking to me since I can remember. You know the one. It said,"Fool! You want to be part of the exercise? Take the elevator down five minutes before the siren goes off!"

Brilliant!!! Such a smart little voice I have. And that is exactly what I did. I took the elevator down and waited for the rest of my neighbours to join me in the shelter.

A few showed up. We were not happy campers. I asked some important questions like: "Does anyone know how to close and open the metal door?" And, then I went to try. A sinch!

Next question: "How do we know when the hell to get out of here?"

Now that was a little trickier. We all had our cell phones. Of course we did! But none of them worked in the shelter. Duh!

So the plan is that we all buy really good flashlights. We all look to see if we have a radio that runs on both electric and battery power...not such an easy thing these days with iPods etc. And I thought someone should check the big tank of water and the toilets. Well, it is important.

Some of you remember the days when we were getting the sealed room ready and I shlepped my friend Rena with me to the Mall. We happily made our way into the pet shop to buy kitty litter.

Shalom ladies, the man said. What kind of kitty litter are you looking for? Scented, unscented? Is a five kilo bag enough? What kind of a cat do you own?

I looked at him and brazenly informed him that we do not own cats...we have no idea about the different kinds of kitty litter...and that I am certain that one kilo each would be sufficient.

He looked at me strangely.

I explained: You see. We are all getting the sealed room ready. My room does not include a bathroom and from my experience from the last time, as soon as the siren goes off, everyone has to go to the toilet. I bought a huge garbage pail and sturdy garbage bags. Now all I need is the kitty litter to well...you know...

I thought the poor man was going to have an attack he laughed so hard. Hysterical. Rena and I had made the man's day.

Actually, I thought it was a brilliant idea.

We did buy the kitty litter...one kilo each. We did set it all up. We didn't, thank God have to use it. And we found nice neighbours who had cats and donated our unopened bags to them after the all clear.

Today I am not in the kitty litter buying stage...although it did cross my mind. I am in the flashlight and radio buying stage.

I wonder why Israel is such a big part of everyone's agenda? I wonder if Obama is going to bow to Mubarak. Wait! Wait! He didn't bow. It was a mistake.

And everyone is in that river in Egypt.
And I am beginning to fear that Mr. Emanuel is a city in Egypt.

(1. denial...2 Putz ah Yid (port said))

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

JOE BTFSPLK

Now that has to be a name you haven't heard of in a long time. Or for you youngsters a name you never heard of.

Joe Btfsplk was a cartoon character from the Li'l Abner comics. Everyone loved poor Joe. Why 'poor Joe'? See, he was always drawn walking under a cloud with little drops of rain just about to land on him.

That is how I feel today in Israel...well, not only today but especially today. See, today we are having a massive air raid drill throughout the entire country. At 11:00 the air raid siren will shrill and everyone has to rush to their fallout shelter or secure room, if they have one in their homes. We don't. Our flat was built before they became a mandatory feature in each apartment. Imagine! A mandatory feature...

I will be home when the siren goes off. My shelter is six floors down in the basement. Jerusalem is lucky. They tell us we have three minutes to get to the shelter. Other places in the country have seconds.

Don't get me wrong. I am glad we are having this drill. I remember growing up in Windsor, Ontario and having fire drills and air raid drills in school where we either had to walk out...single file and slowly...from the building, or dash under our desks and put our hands over our heads.

Then the 'bad guy' was Russia and Russia was farrrrrrrrr away. The fear was real at the time, but the threat was as nebulous as Joe's cloud.

This fear is real and right across the street. And I do not believe this is just an 'exercise'. It is too massive and too serious and too real for just an exercise. I am sorry my babies are going to be rushing into their shelters at school and nursery school today. But I am thrilled they will be with people they trust who will help them understand what is going on in a language they will understand.

The Big Bad Wolf is knocking at the door. And we little ahem 'Pigs' have to build a house of bricks.

I read two articles this morning when I got up. The first was from The Washington Post and I quote:
Obama Says U.S. Must Be More 'Honest' With Israel
By Michael D. Shear
On the eve of his trip to the Middle East, President Obama promised today a dose of tough love for a new Israeli government that has signaled significant disagreement with his administration's policy for the region.

"Part of being a good friend is being honest," Obama told National Public Radio in an interview taped this afternoon. "And I think there have been times where we are not as honest as we should be about the fact that the current direction, the current trajectory, in the region is profoundly negative, not only for Israeli interests but also U.S. interests. And that's part of a new dialogue that I'd like to see encouraged in the region."


Mr. President, Sir, Part of being a good friend is understanding and accepting, if and when, your friend has a view different than yours. Part of being a good friend, is standing solidly beside your friend in public and, if all forms of dialogue still have you with different viewpoints, then accepting that your friend has the right to think differently than you do. Part of being a friend, is not being friendly with your friend's enemies...with people who have hurt your friend or are planning to wipe him off the face of the earth. Part of being a friend is just that...being a friend. Not a 'fairweatherfriend' when things are going smoothly. But, a real friend, who understands the other guy's fear and pain and will stand beside him when the bully is knocking at his door.

But, my dear readers, I have never thought that President Obama is my friend. Mr. President, walk a mile in my shoes. You don't get it. I know you don't get it. What scares the bejezzus out of me is the thought that by the time you do get it,it will be too late.

After reading the entire article from the Post this morning, I read another article, and I quote: The speaker is Steven Harper, the Prime Minister of Canada.
Toronto (JTA)By Ron Csillag · June 1, 2009
"This week in parliament, we will introduce legislation that will give victims of terrorism the power to obtain just compensation from those responsible for their suffering," Harper said. The bill "will allow victims to sue perpetrators and sponsors of terrorist acts, including foreign states, in Canadian courts."

The measure, Harper said, aims to send a "clear message that our government will hold the sponsors and perpetrators of terrorism accountable for their crimes."

"We remain among the world's most vocal in opposition to not only the nuclear program of the government of Iran but also to its malevolent anti-Israeli and anti-Jewish declarations," Harper said.

"It is all too common nowadays for politicians to claim to support Israel and the Jewish people. Yet when Israel is attacked for the umpteenth time, because its enemies refuse to accept the right of the Jewish state to exist, these same politicians are quick to condemn Israel, to accuse it of war crimes and to demand that it unilaterally suspend its right to self-defense,” he said. "You will not hear that kind of double-speak from our government -- ever."



Back to our friend Joe.One storyline in the early 1970s features him trapping his cloud in a special anti-pollutant jar. Joe becomes romantically involved with a gal for the first time—until her crazed ex-boyfriend shows up to kill him! Joe reluctantly opens the jar and releases his cloud in order to take care of the boyfriend, and wistfully realizes that he wasn't meant for any other kind of life. As he returns to his normal, loner existence, his cloud once again in tow, he is for the moment satisfied to be who he really is.

That is how I feel today in Israel...well, not only today but especially today. Do we, in Israel have to accept as normal a loner existence? I thought the world learned a lesson. But maybe I was wrong. And, if so...then I guess Israel is going to have to tread softly but carry a big stick.

May you and yours never have to do what me and mine are doing today. But, my dear friends, I honestly do believe that if the world doesn't stop the black cloud that is growing over our heads, then all of us are going to run into shelters sooner than you think. So, maybe instead of rhetoric and olive branches we have to shake some sabers and...I was going to say 'call a spade a spade', but I don't want in anyway to be thought of as racist, so, instead I will use a Hebrew expression:l'kroh et ha yeled b'shmoh...to call the child by it's rightful name.

Stay safe. Always.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.