THINGS I LOVE

I love the feel of my tush as it settles into the seat of an airplane.

I love walking OUT of the dentist's office.

I love a hot cup of coffee in the morning.

I love the sound of children's laughter.

I love knowing my family is safe in their own beds.

I love it when my babies call me Bubbie.

I love the rain.

I love going out with friends for a meal.

I love a good book.

I love talking to my mother on the phone.

I love family sitting around a full table.

I love writing.

I love my laptop.

I love my blog and yours.

I love the quiet of the middle of the night.

I love having a tv in my bedroom.

I love Friday afternoons.

I love Jerusalem/Israel.

I love you (you know who you are).

Shavuah tov.

Have a great day...stay safe...thanks for dropping in.

THINGS I'M NOT HAPPY ABOUT

I'm not happy that Melissa Doolitle was kicked off of American Idol.

I'm not happy that my tofu cheesecake tasted like poison!!! And smelled like it too!!! Do not...I repeat...do not make that tofu cheesecake...feh!!! (and never mind that it cost a fortune for that kilo of tofu...yuk).

I'm not happy that I have some kind of a stomach thing and am expressing myself eloquently from both ends...ahem!!!

I'm not happy about an email I sent by mistake. You know that moment when you lose your mind and then it's too late? Oy!

I'm not happy that Bubbie Channah may have to move as her landlord is asking for too much money this year.

I'm not happy that I can't go to the States this summer to visit. The tickets were $1500 with two stops both ways! I even checked...shhhh don't tell anyone...Heil Hitler Airlines...shhhhhh. Can you see me flying Luftansa and stopping over in Germany??? I DON'T THINK SO!!!

But I am happy that my family is safe. That my Joe College got a 92 on a very important paper...that my oldest son keeps giving me a hug and kiss whenever he sees me...that my babies and DIL love me...that my daughter is the most amazing person I know...that Bubbie Channah is the best Mom a girl could have and is well...that my brother Dovidle is the finest man I know...that my other brother Maeshey is so special...and I'm happy that as Elton said, "I'm still standing!"

So I guess when I put the I'm not happy things on one side of the scale...they are soooooooo unimportant when compared to what I am blessed with.

Ok, I feel better.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

THE BEST CHEESE CAKE YOU EVER TASTED

True to my word...have I ever lied to you? Here is my/Rena's recipe for White Chocolate Cheesecake. Trust me. To die for!

WHITE CHOCOLATE CHEESE CAKE
-2 packages of cream cheese 30%-I know :)-(in Israel I use Napoleon)225grams/8oz each
-1/2 cup of sugar
-2 eggs
-1/2 teaspoon vanilla
-100 grams/3oz of white chocolate
-any plain cookies for the crust
-a couple of Tablespoons of melted butter
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
INSTRUCTIONS:
-crush the cookies in a blender or food processor 18-25 cookies
-melt the butter and mix into crushed cookies
-place in a 9 inch pan and bake in oven 180 degrees for 5 minutes
-let cool
-mix the cream cheese, sugar, vanilla and blend well
-add the eggs
-melt the chocolate carefully as white chocolate tends to burn in a double boiler or your microwave
-stir in the white chocolate
-pour over the crust
-bake in a 180 degree oven for 20-30 minutes
-center still slightly wiggly
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TOPPING (IF YOU'D LIKE)

1 1/2 cup 27 % sour cream - I know :)
1 1/2 Tablespoons sugar
1/4 teaspoon vanilla
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-leave the oven on
-don't let the cheescake cool
-mix the ingredients together and gently spread over the top of the cake
-bake for 10 minutes more 180 degree oven
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Enjoy, enjoy. Easy and delicious. The kind of cake that you eat by mistake while you are 'only straightening out the line' in the pan.

Off to teach my student who is still in the hospital. And then spending the day with Bubbie Channah. We haven't had a day for ourselves in a bit and it's time.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

SHLIMAZEL

How do I explain what a shlimazzle is? A shlemiel is the guy who always spills his soup. The shlimazel is the guy the soup spills on. Get it?

Well, I told you how I did my impression of Sonia Heini a few years ago in my kitchen. Remeber? The kid, Joe College was off on his quest for six months to South America and there was one tiny drop of water on the floor and I found it and did the splits?

That is being a shlimazel.

Yesterday, somehow...actually, I know how. I was sitting at the computer and reached up to put my legs on the dining room chair and when I finally broght them back down to earth again, don't ask.

Ok. Ask already. I pulled a muscle...stretched something...next to my knee...on the left side. OUCH OUCH OUCH!!!

Lucky, it was the same side where I did my splits so the end result is that I'm limping on the same foot. I mean, picture if it had been on the other side. I would have looked like either I just got off a horse, or had been at sea for the past year and a half.

To put it mildly, I am not a happy camper. OUCH OUCH OUCH!!!

The good news is that my daughter-in-law has invited the entire family, including Bubbie Channah, OF COURSE, to her house for Shavuot on Tuesday night and get this...I don't have to cook!

Yahoooooooooooo. I get to come as a guest. What a gift.

I'll let you know how it was. In the meantime, I will still make my huha white chocolate cheese cake...that is tomorrow's blog so get your pencil and paper ready...and my tofu chocolate cheese cake (I'll let you know if it tastes gorgeous or like you know what) and kaddeh.

Kaddeh is a traditional Kurdi (my husband is from Kurdistan) dish only served at Shavuot. The original recipe calls for a yeast bread dough which you roll out and fill with cheese and then cook on a huge upside down wok over a wood burning fire.

Yah, right! Here is my version. I buy a package of frozen malawach (Yeminite flat bread) and while it is still frozen I take each circle and cut it in half. I add a mixture of grated very salty white cheese and grated yellow cheese to the half and fold it into a triangle and seal the sides.

Then I simply cook it on the stove in a heavy frying pan. Trust me it is gorgeous!

so, I'm making kaddeh and I think salmon. We only eat dairy on Shavuot...no meat or chicken. Hard when you have a kid who isn't eating any milk products, but I will manage.

Godda run. Teaching from noon till seven tonight. English bagrut (matriculation) exam is tomorrow. After that I should have more time to shmooze.

Shmooze? Kinda like shoot the breeze...gossip...you know, chat.

In case you forgot...OUCH OUCH OUCH!

Shavuah tov.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

GUESS WHAT

An update: I went to the mall and bought the kilo of tofu. It cost me 90 shekels which is around $23!!! Now I love my kid. And I don't mind spending money on him. But if the thing turns out to taste like sh** I mean yukky, then I will not be a happy camper. Next week I will not only tell you how it comes out, but I will give you the recipe for the best darn white chocolate cheesecake that you have ever tasted. Trust me on this one.

So, here for a bit of fun are some statistics for you.

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)

If you passed gas, ahem, consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it!)

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(O.M.G.!)

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)(Don't tell anyone I just said the word pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy.)
(I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour
(Don't try this at home, maybe at work)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
(Honey, I'm home. What the...?!)

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes... Lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)

Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm......)

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(Okay, so that would be a good thing)

A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
( I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too.)

Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.
(What about that pig??)

Shabbat shalom.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

MAKING A NO CHEESE CHEESCAKE...OR IT AIN'T EASY BEING A MOM

My youngest, Joe College is off dairy products for awhile for health reasons. And next week is Shavuot.

http://www.jewfaq.org/holidayc.htm"

Shavuot, the Festival of Weeks, is the second of the three major festivals with both historical and agricultural significance (the other two are Passover and Sukkot). Agriculturally, it commemorates the time when the first fruits were harvested and brought to the Temple, and is known as Hag ha-Bikkurim (the Festival of the First Fruits). Historically, it celebrates the giving of the Torah at Mount Sinai, and is also known as Hag Matan Torateinu (the Festival of the Giving of Our Torah).


It is noteworthy that the holiday is called the time of the giving of the Torah, rather than the time of the receiving of the Torah. The sages point out that we are constantly in the process of receiving the Torah, that we receive it every day, but it was first given at this time. Thus it is the giving, not the receiving, that makes this holiday significant.


It is customary to stay up the entire first night of Shavu'ot and study Torah, then pray as early as possible in the morning.

It is customary to eat a dairy meal at least once during Shavu'ot. There are varying opinions as to why this is done. Some say it is a reminder of the promise regarding the land of Israel, a land flowing with "milk and honey." According to another view, it is because our ancestors had just received the Torah (and the dietary laws therein), and did not have both meat and dairy dishes available.

The book of Ruth is read at this time. Again, there are varying reasons given for this custom, and none seems to be definitive.

Well, now that you know what Shavuot is all about, and you know that my kid is off dairy...what you don't know is that it is traditional to make a cheese cake (among other things) for the holiday.

So, being the good mom that I am, I went online and found some Vegan recipes. Now, I wish you could see the faces on the people when I walk into a health food store. I mean, I'm the corned beef and pecan pie lady, remember? But since my kid is on this meshuggeneh diet, I have become an expert on where the soy milk is kept and what tofu cheeses are available. And God bless them all for their variety of products that we can get here in Israel.

Ok. Here is the Chocolate-Tofu Cheesecake recipes that I chose. If you have any ideas I would love to hear them. I have until the 22nd to become an expert.

Vegan Chocolate Cheesecake
1 1/2 pounds firm tofu
1 pound soft (silken) tofu
2 1/2 cups sugar
1 cup chocolate chips or 2/3 cup carob cocoa
2 tsp. vanilla extract
1 tsp. almond extract
1 cup chocolate soymilk
graham cracker pie crust

Have crust ready. Drain tofu between 2 towels with a breadboard weight on top for about 20 minutes. Blend the drained tofu, 1/2 pund at a time, until smooth and creamy. With each 1/2 pound in the blender add 1/2 cup of sugar. Pour all the blended tofu and sugar into a bowl.

Preaheat the oven to 350 degrees. Melt chocolate (if using) in a double boiler and add to the blended tofu mixture. Mix together with remaining ingredients. Pour this mixture into the prebaked crust, then bake for about 35-60 minutes depending on your oven or until the top appears solid. Chill for 1-2 hours before serving.

Ok folks. Waddya think?

Gone are the days of the white chocolate cheesecake recipe that I have from my friend Rena. Sigh. Tofu? Carob cocoa? But a Mom's godda do what a Mom's godda do.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

WHAT A DIFFERENCE A DAY MAKES

Well, by the time I dragged my weary bones back into bed last night, I think I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

The good news is that Sweetsie Girl is feeling much better and back at her gan (nursery school) today. Now, I am not sure, but I think I promised her the house and car and all my jewelry yesterday. See, for five solid hours we talked. Actually she spoke and I just said YES in the appropriate places. I have no idea what she said as she is only two and had a pacifier in her mouth at the time. But I got the part where she said, Bubbie I love lu. That I got really good. And we were hugging and smooching for those five hours so how bad can that be?

And all that time we were watching tv. Five hours of the equivalent of Sesame Street, Israeli version. WOW. But, to tell you the truth, between the non-stop conversation and the tv I was exhausted.

I hate to admit this, but I'm not used to all that noise any more. Since I closed my learning center and gave up being a boss and executive personage, ahem, and since my kids have all grown up, and since I now live with my husband and joe college and not all three kids and their friends and all the neighbour kids running in and out...I kinda got used to quiet.

How did that happen to me? I used to be a night owl...you know...up until two-three in the morning, writing, emailing, chatting online, reading, watching tv. Yes that person.

I love the quiet hours of the middle of the night. No phones/no talking/no problems that need immediate attention/no cooking/cleaning/washing up...just me and the quiet. Well, since I joined my new sorority...yes I still am a Phi Sigma Sigma girl but now I am also a C.S.G (senior citizen girl) and that comes with a lot of perks.

I don't have to get up and relinquish my seat when an old f*rt my age gets on. I get discount bus tickets. I am the matriarch of the family. And on and on. And I have earned every grey hair in my head.

I figure we only get two doors to choose from...get old...get dead. I chose the first one and am having a great time even though I'm not as spry as I used to be. Sigh.

So, after watching my little granddaughter, I ran home to teach one of my students. then grabbed a cab and went to Rena's and we fought the Jerusalem Day traffic and went out for dinner.

We had a lot to talk about. A lot to eat. A lot of fun. And at around 10:30 I shlepped my weary bones up the stairs and into the elevator and home at last.

Dorothy was right. There's no place like home.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

MY FAVOURITE JOB...ALMOST

Two days ago my daughter-in-law phoned and told me that my little two year old granddaughter, sweetsie girl, was running a high fever. OY! She took her to the doctor and the baby has a little sore throat and some reddness in her ears.

Happens to kids (and Bubbie's too).

Yesterday, I couldn't help out as I was teaching all day.

But today I am free until around two this afternoon so I am off to babysit my baby. I have absolutely no idea how she is going to react being alone with me without her older brother, the four year old, sweetsie tootsie.

It is either going to be a wonderful huggy/lovey day or one of tears and cries 'I want my Mommy' kind of day.

I got up at five thirty and made a meatloaf, out of ground turkey, for my family. Won't have time later. And I'm off to shower, dress, and meet the kid.

The good news is that she loves me...she really loves me (oscar, oscar) and I don't have to tell you how much I love her and her brother.

She has a way of making your heart sing like only little girls can. Her brother is all businesslike. Last week when I was there babysitting he watched me wash the dishes and announced, 'Bubbie, don't use too much water! We have to watch the Kinneret!' For those of you who don't know...the Kinneret is our main water source and someplace there is a mysterious red line. We watch that red line...well, someone does and announces over the radio and tv what the situation is. I think if it gets too far down the red line then we drink tadpoles or something yukky like that. Sigh.

So, off I go. I'll let you know tomorrow how it went. But, good or bad, easy or not, I'm going to spend some time with my sweetsie girl...and could there be anything better than that?

Well, yes. Spending time without the fever and the ouchy throat and ears.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

PRAYERS AND THE ZODIAC SIGNS

Prayers and Zodia Signs
Astrology Humour

ARIES: "Dear God! Give me PATIENCE and I want it NOW!"

TAURUS: "Dear God, please help me accept CHANGE in my life, but NOT YET."

GEMINI: "Yo God...(or is it Goddess?)...Who are you?...What are you?.....Where are You?.....How many of you ARE there? I can't figure you out!"

CANCER: "Dear Daddy, I know I shouldn't depend on you so much, but you're the only One I can count on while my security blanket is at the cleaners."

LEO: "Hi, Pop! I'll bet you're really proud to have me as your kid!"

VIRGO: "Dear God, please make the world a better place, and don't screw it up like you did the last time."

LIBRA: "Dear God, I know I should make decisions for myself. But, on the other hand, what do YOU think?"

SCORPIO: "Dear God, help me forgive my enemies, even if the bastards don't deserve it."

SAGITTARIUS: "OH ALMIGHTY, ALL KNOWING, ALL-LOVING, ALL-POWERFUL, OMNIPRESENT, EVERLASTING GOD, IF I'VE ASKED YOU ONCE, I'VE ASKED YOU A THOUSAND TIMES --- HELP ME STOP EXAGGERATING!!!!!!!!!!"

CAPRICORN: "Dear Father, I was going to pray, but I guess I ought to figure things out for myself. Thanks anyway."

AQUARIUS: "Hi God! Some say you're a man. Some say you're a woman. I say we're ALL God. So, why pray? Let's have a party!"

PISCES: "Heavenly Father, as I prepare to consume this last fifth of Scotch to drown out my pain and sorrow, may my inebriation be for Thy greater Honor and Glory."

Just a little fun on a Sunday morning. Happy Mother's Day!!!

Shavuah tov.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

WHAT TIME OF DAY ARE YOU? FROM CARA'S BLOG

You Are Midnight

You are more than a little eccentric, and you're apt to keep very unusual habits. Whether you're a nightowl, living in a commune, or taking a vow of silence - you like to experiment with your lifestyle. Expressing your individuality is important to you, and you often lie awake in bed thinking about the world and your place in it. You enjoy staying home, but that doesn't mean you're a hermit. You also appreciate quality time with family and close friends.

What Time Of Day Are You?

Thank you Cara...http://venezuela4me.blogspot.com/

I love the quiet of the middle of the night. I collect owls. I guess I'm Midnight. Yahooooo, I love it when it works.

Just got back from the cemetery...30 days since my Mother-In-Law AH passed away and here in Israel just as we bury immediately, the stone is put up after thirty days. Then the men can shave and it will be up to each of the mourners just how they intend to spend the next 11 months...how long their mourning period will be. The strictes that I know is not going to any places of entertainment or even weddings where there is music. It is up to them.

Another generation gone. And here's a sobering thought...now I am the oldest in the family. Sigh. I know, I know...under your breath you are saying tfu tfu tfu :))).

Shabbat shalom.

Have a great day...stay safe...thanks for dropping in.

STOLEN...I MEAN BORROWED FROM MY FRIEND DAISYIMA

Far away in the tropical waters of the Caribbean, two prawns were swimming around in the sea

One called Justin and the other called Christian.

The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that inhabited the area.

Finally one day Justin said to Christian, "I'm fed up with being a prawn; I wish I was a shark, and then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten."

A large mysterious cod appeared and said, "Your wish is granted"

Lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark.

Horrified, Christian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.

Time passed (as it does) and Justin found life as a shark boring and lonely.

All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them.

Justin didn't realize that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.

While swimming alone one day he saw the mysterious cod again and he thought perhaps the mysterious fish could change him back into a prawn.

He approached the cod and begged to be changed back, and, lo and behold, he found himself turned back into a prawn.

With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes Justin swam back to his friends and bought them all a cocktail.

(The punch line does not involve a prawn cocktail - it's much worse).

Looking around the gathering at the reef he realized he couldn't see his old pal.

"Where's Christian?" he asked.

"He's at home, still distraught that his best friend changed sides to the enemy & became a shark", came the reply.

Eager to put things right again and end the mutual pain and torture, he set off to Christian's abode.

As he opened the coral gate, memories came flooding back.

He banged on the door and shouted, "It's me, Justin, your old friend, come out and see me again."

Christian replied, "No way man, you'll eat me. You're now a shark, the enemy, and I'll not be tricked into being your dinner."

Justin cried back "No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've changed.".........

(You're going to love this...)

(Scroll Down.)

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"I've found Cod! I'm a Prawn again, Christian".

The devil made me do it... :)

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

NOT ENOUGH HOURS IN THE DAY

I love being busy. But some days are simply ridiculous. Today is going to be one of those days. I start in about an hour and will finish twelve hours later. So I decided I better come online quick and say howdeedoo or another day would go by without our chatting.

Last night at my writing class the group got my last chapter of Emma. Thank goodness they not only loved it but 'got it'. Yahooooo for everyone. Next meeting they'll get the epilogue and then we party.

I don't know where the time flies. It has already been thirty days since my Mother-In-Law, AH passed away. Tomorrow is the seudah, a dinner for the mourners and relatives and closest friends. And then Friday morning we are back in the cemetery to put up the stone and pay our respects.

Somewhere in the middle of the rush of the past month with the emotional impact still hovering and weighing us all down the days simply slipped by.

So, I just wanted to take a moment to say hi and tell you that I love you.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

READ ANY GOOD BOOKS LATELY?

I don't know about you...but I love books. I love shopping for them; browsing; looking at your bookshelves; buying them and reading them.

My friend Rena and I swap books. We don't always like the same things...for example, I love historical fiction. You know the kind...'Picture this. England 1066.' That's how I got hooked on the Diana Gabaldon series...Claire and Jaimie. And Phillipa Gregory...The Other Bolyn Girl. And Lady of Hay by Barbara Erskine.

Add to that lot my 'whodunits', and anything that has to do with Israel, plus my mystical/shmystical stuff and you basically have my library.

Oh, and John, from my writing group and I share a love of fantasy fiction too. Sigh.

I just finished Joel C. Rosenberg's latest (well latest for Israel) The Copper Scrolls. Woohu!

Now I'm back to my old friends Nelson DeMille, John Lescroart and Wilbur Smith.

But, I must admit that I am also hooked on Nora Roberts. Shhhhh. Don't tell. The woman writes four books a year...FOUR. She has close to 300,000 books in print! They are all the same. And we all run to buy the next one. And if you love mysteries in future tense, then try out her series under the name of J.D. Robb.

People say you should write books like the ones you love to read. Hmmmm. My first effort (which is still in the box waiting for a rewrite) was called My Heart Told Me...the story of Bubbie Channah and her mother's life around the Second World War.
Then, came Emma Shelby is No More...which is being edited now by dear friends before going off to California. That one is the story of an American girl who meets a Muslim man and how their cultures affect their lives.

So, I guess I have to add to my list of loving books the love of writing books. AHHHHH.

You read any good books lately?

ps...happy birthday guv!!!

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

A LITTLE BIT OF FLUFF ON A SUNDAY MORNING

HOW TO TELL THE SEX OF A FLY:

A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with
a fly swatter.
"What are you doing?" She asked.
"Hunting Flies" He responded.
"Oh. Killing any?" She asked.
"Yep, 3 males, 2 Females," he replied.
Intrigued, she asked. "How can you tell?"
He responded, "3 were on a beer can, 2 were
on the phone."

And you probably thought this would be dirty :)

Shavuah tov.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

IN REGIONE CAECORUM REX EST LUSCUS

'In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king.' Desiderius Erasmus (1466-1536)

So, ask me what's new? Go ahead. Ask me.

Don't ask.

Now let's see. Our Foreign Minister, Tsipi Livi, just committed hara-kiri as she thought she could lead a bloodless coup to oust Olmert and take his place. Sorry, Tsip. You are playing in the big leagues now and I think you have just turned yourself into toast.

The rally in Rabin Sqare last night in Tel Aviv hosted around 150,000 demonstrators in a valiant effort to get Olmert to resign. Let's see now what happens in the on-going saga of 'I'm sitting in my seat until the cows come home'.

Now, and here comes the biggie for today. But, first, you know how much I love this country. What a gift it is to live in Jerusalem. But like all gifts, it is dear...in both senses of the word.

So, get this. Israel has a gazillion political parties...sigh...and then they scramble to make up the 61 minimum coalition in order to run the government (120 members of the Knesset).

Among all those parties are Arab parties. Yes, we have Arab Chaveri(Members)Knesset. I always thought that was sort of like letting the cat guard the dish of milk, but who am I and what do I know? No one wants to be thought of as a bigot.

For those of you who don't know, Azmi bishara, was head of his party, Balad, until April of this year, when he resigned. When he discovered that he was being investigated for crimes against the state, he took off and couldn't be stopped because he had parliamentary immunity.

Now that he resigned, his immunity is gone but so is he. Sigh. Hello??? Is anyone watching the store?

Guess what the member of our Knesset did while he was in office!

www.jpost.com/servlet/Satellite?cid=1178096592312&pagename=JPost%2FJPArticle%2FShowFull

In one of the most serious cases of espionage in Israeli history, the Shin
Bet (Israel Security Agency) revealed Wednesday that former Balad chairman
Azmi Bishara was under investigation for allegedly spying on behalf of
Hizbullah during the Second Lebanon War by providing the guerrilla group
with targets for their rockets, as well as classified military information.

The former MK allegedly transferred to Hizbullah information, predictions,
assessments and recommendations about the political echelon, the IDF and the
Israeli public during the war.


In addition to supplying information to a Hizbullah intelligence agent,
Bishara allegedly held contacts with intelligence officials from other
countries.

Bishara, the Shin Bet said, also received detailed missions from Hizbullah,
which he carried out.

During the war, Bishara reportedly gave advice to Hizbullah on how to
"deepen their strikes against Israel." He also allegedly gave advice
concerning the effects of Hizbullah's use of long-range missiles south of
Haifa, and Israel's response to the attacks. Several days after supposedly
Bishara gave his opinion to Hizbullah, rockets fell south of Haifa.

He also allegedly transferred military information to Hizbullah that,
according to the Shin Bet, he knew to have been classified by the IDF
censor. Bishara also supposedly informed Hizbullah of what he called
"Israel's intention to target Hizbullah leader Sheikh Hassan Nasrallah."

AND WE LET THE MAMZER GO.

Hello??? Is anybody there? Who's minding the store? You turned a 'blind eye' and wished him bon voyage?

What can I tell you? How far does democracy go before it becomes ridiculous?

I don't know. But I'm still glad that I live in a democratic country that is willing to give the 'other guy' a chance.

BUT. I always say...anyone can screw me once. If I let them get me a second time then I have no one to blame, but myself.

Tune in tomorrow for the next episode of The Chosen Kids...wait, wait...I mean People.

Shabbat shalom.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.

AND YOU THOUGHT GOD DOESN'T HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOUR

Are you ready for the lastest chapter in Dumb and Dumber, aka 'The thunder you hear is God laughing His head off. The rain you feel is God laughing so hard that tears are flowing from His eyes?

This morning at seven, as usual I phoned Bubbie Channah to see how she is and how was her night. We speak about a gazillion times a day.

Bubbie Channah is 83 tfu tfu tfu. Bubbie Channah runs to Hamashbir, the local department store/super market every day. Bubbie Channah goes to grab a hamburger at her local favourite hamburger joint every afternoon (yes my mother in her golden years is a junk food junkie...sigh). Except for those two daily excursions, Bubbie Channah can usually be found in her flat knitting or reading a book with the television set to Fox News.

Bubbie Channah knows everything. And in case you are wondering, she is rooting for Phil on American Idol...she loves the Sopranos...and plays the lottery twice a week.

Don't mess with Bubbie Channah.

So, why am I telling you all this? Here is our conversation this morning.

B.C.: Nu so did you see the news last night?
Me: No, I was visiting the babies and missed it.
B.C.: So you didn't see how Olmert looks like he didn't sleep all night? Actually it said that he didn't sleep all night.
Me: Of course he didn't sleep. The man has the skin of an elephant. What the hell does he think he's doing by hanging on? He didn't get elected. The only reason he's sitting in the chair is that Sharon became a latkeh.
B.C.: There's more.
Me: What more could there be?
B.C.: They can't call for early elections.
Me: They can't? Why not?
B.C: Because the President has to call for early elections and he's being tried for rape.
Me: Oy!
B.C.: And the acting president doesn't have the authority.
Me: (Laughing hysterically by now) Get the hell out of here! You've got to be kidding! Where did you hear that?
B.C.: On the English news.

Well, my friends. What can I tell you? We have a P.M. who is incompetent...and is being investigated for taking bribes and who knows what else...who can't be kicked out because the President has been relieved from his duties as he is being tried for rape.

Somebody is laughing His head off. And of course this is happening to us. Aren't we God's Chosen People? So who else would He choose to play a practical joke on? Oy.

You still think God doesn't have a sense of humour? Ask Mrs. Lot!

Have a great day...stay safe...thanks for dropping in.

THE MIDDLE EAST ISN'T THE MID WEST

Never a dull moment in the Middle East. Never. Tweedle Dee, aka Ehud Olmert...I mean PRIMINISTER Ehud Olmert has just been blasted by the Winograd Report

http://tinyurl.com/2ghkvm

I thought I would quote from the text above, but it is simply too horrendous to read again. The man has the chutzpah/gaul to get on televison yesterday and say that now he is going to learn from his mistakes!

Too little too late. Go tell that to the bereaved families and the wounded, Mr. P.M.

Then, there is Tweedle Dum aka Amir Peretz...I mean MINISTER OF DEFENCE Amir Peretz.

They don't even have the grace to resign. But, I hope in the days and weeks to come we will make them realize that their days of ruling us are over. They never should have been in power in the first place.

Olmert wasn't elected...Sharon had a stroke...and if you ask me they should have let the man die. Then he would have had a huge funeral and all the heads of state and kings and queens and Lord alone knows who else, would have come and paid their respect to the man who evicted over 8,000 Jews from their homes and left them standing in the middle of the street, homeless, jobless and for what? (Well, we all know for what...so that the country would be busy with the eviction and not pay too much attention to his hanky-panky with the money). Sigh.

Now, he's a latkeh in some hospice and we got Olmert. And his group of henchmen. This one is under investigation for sex crimes, that one for taking bribes, another one for who knows what...there isn't one person left to vote for who hasn't either put his hand in the till or in some lady's ahem. Bill Clinton must be hysterical. Like Jackie Mason says...'You don't screw an entire country and end up with phlebitis!!!

So, like the husband says to his wife when she confronts him with the fact that she saw him come out of a motel with her best friend, 'Nope, not me. Couldn't have been me. I was in another part of town at the time. You're mistaken.' And the woman wants to believe him, so she does.

Me? I don't believe you Mister P.M. I never trusted you. I hate what you have done to my city since you were mayor. I don't believe a word that comes out of your mouth and I hope if you are guilty of all the corruption and crimes that they are investigating you for, that you do jail time like I would have to do as an ordinary citizen.

Mr. Minister of Defence...what were you thinking? You might be a nice man but you come out an idiot. Did you forget that we are a country surrounded by people who want us dead? And don't forget their cousins who live inside our cities...and are members of our Knesset.

And finally, you two...what makes you think that any of us will trust you to come back with a bag of milk if we send you to the store? You think we would trust you to protect us or guide us through another war?

And if the smoke signals are right, there may just be another war this summer.

And then the biggie...how about Achmadinamamzer who wants us to all be toast?

Resign. Clean up your house before we get into more trouble.

Hello??? Is anybody there???

Sigh.

Have a great day...stay safe...and thanks for dropping in.